73. the cure

Wednesday, Mercury day. Messenger day. Mind day. 

And for me (as you may now know), school day. I’m sitting in class (Shadow to Soul) and thinking about the response to yesterday’s post about how it feels to be individually and collectively holding too much.

What do we do, then, with this universal ache? How do we move amidst the magnitude of what seems stacked against us? I’m pulling today from the words of some human teachers, mystics and scholars, to offer some insights into this question.

First, we might decide that the pain is purposeful and often a compass point to get closer to our gifts, values, and calling - facets of our individual soul expression... so says Camille Green:

In modern culture today where many have become obsessed with one directional ascension, be it through constant achievement and progress in the material world or the denial of the shadow and the darkness in the spiritual world, it’s no wonder we may feel lost, afraid, broken, unworthy, unlovable, and even insane when we enter the initiation of descent. But the secret and the magic and mystery is that our very light, our very treasure, our very gifts live in this dark underworld that requires us to get very intimate with our deepest pain.

Second, we might recognize that grief, heartache, longing, even rage, are necessary to galvanize action in the direction of who we want to be, or what we need to do, as ecopsychologist Joseph Dodds points out:

The grief and anger we feel concerning collapsing ecosystems, our pain for the World is appropriate and, although difficult, provides the starting point for action and a renewed relation to Earth.

I'd say the grief and anger we feel for anything, everything, is likely the starting point for action and a renewed (reviewed, revised, reborn) relation with the matter at hand.

Or, a third way - could we perhaps, even see the wound, the too-much-ness, the heaviness of what we are holding as a doorway into the sacred? This is the direction Mirabai Starr, one of my favorite writers and women mystics, points us to explore. 

For women mystics, contemplative life is not so much a matter of transcending the illusions of mundane existence or attaining states of perfect equanimity as it is about becoming as fully present as possible to the realities of the human experience. In showing up for what is, no matter how pedestrian or tedious, how aggravating or shameful, that what is begins to reveal itself as imbued with holiness.

The path of the mystic reconciles contradictory propositions (such as harrowing sorrow and radical amazement) and blesses us with an extended capacity to sit with ambiguity, to treasure vulnerability, to celebrate paradox as the highest truth.

Or... no, and, because the answer is always D) all of the above - can what we love be the cure? Michael Meade, philosopher, storyteller and scholar of myth, says it's just that. 

Of all the paths of awakening and ways of learning, there is one pathway that appears as an initiatory requirement for each soul born… the mystery of love. Love is an essential element in each person's life; it is also the quintessential element of life on Earth itself.

In Greek myths, Eros is a divine figure, also called protogenos, meaning “the first one born.” In the darkness and chaos before creation began the Goddess of Night united with the Wind and produced a golden egg that was set upon the primordial ocean. When this original egg cracked, what had been concealed in darkness became revealed as the primal energy that connects all life. 

Without the connecting energy of Eros or love, the world could not come together or be able to hold together.

In mythic terms, the act of creation is not simply something in the distant past; but rather a dynamic, ongoing process that continues to inspire and shape the living world. In that sense, when everything seems dark and chaotic, the energy of creation is near and the missing ingredient, ever waiting to arise is always Eros or love, the interconnectedness of life…

The voice of the little-self says, but I am but a speck in the great ocean of life, what difference can my loving make? It's true that each person is microscopic compared to the cosmos. Each of us is but a frail being compared to the massive crises facing the world. Yet, each soul is also a living link in the great chain of being that began with creation and continues to sustain collective life on earth.

It is our shared fate, to be alive at this troubled time and we are being called to help weave the elements of life back together. On one level, we are insignificant; on another level, each of us is a unique torchbearer carrying the eternal flame of imagination and the energies of creation.

If we allow ourselves to forget that we are initiates come here to open again the paths of mystery; if we forget that we are also lovers come here to keep creation going, then consciousness diminishes, the world becomes darker and the genuine paths of knowledge and devotion become obscured…

We can find ourselves in danger of breaking the hidden unity of the living chain of being. Eros was there at the very beginning, concealed in darkness and chaos and the energies of love and creation are trying to be found again in the darkness and turmoil of our troubled times.

We all need more of the medicines found in eros and love. For, what we love is the cure and also the path that can open us to creation’s core.

***

Sometimes, when I am feeling lost and uncertain of my direction, I ground myself by making a list of everything I love. Not so much a gratitude list, though it ends up being that too, but a list of everything that makes me feel connected, alive, in awe of this human experience. It is a pleasure list, passion list, like list, totem and talisman and symbol list - it is reminding myself of what speaks to and enlivens me.

What lights and ignites the part of me that knows, agrees, and participates fully in this quest of being alive in human form?

What about you? What is your creative cure for this universal ache, the too-much-ness we are holding? What are you weaving? What is the song of your eros? In what ways are you initiating yourself into this mystery of love during this chapter of your life? 

My inbox is always open for your reply. But also, maybe take it into your dreams. Maybe ask the roses in your garden, or the raven on the stump. Ask the storm, sunset, or the afternoon traffic. See if your pets know the answer. 

I’ll close tonight with a piece I love, maybe it's the cure (see what I did there?) from Adrienne Maree Brown's Emergent Strategy: 

If there happens to be a multitude of griefs upon you, individual and collective, or fast and slow, or small and large, add equal parts of these considerations:

that the broken heart can cover more territory.

that perhaps love can only be as large as grief demands.

that grief is the growing up of the heart that bursts boundaries like an old skin or a finished life.

that grief is gratitude.

that water seeks scale, that even your tears seek the recognition of community.

that the heart is a front line and the fight is to feel in a world of distraction.

that death might be the only freedom.

that your grief is a worthwhile use of your time.

that your body will feel only as much as it is able to.

that the ones you grieve may be grieving you.

that the sacred comes from the limitations,

and that you are excellent at loving.